Confidence In College – How To Be Socially And Academically Confident

Confidence is powerful in college.

In college, confidence can help you take your life to the next level.

It’s the difference between having tons of friends versus sitting in your room bored and lonely.

It’s the difference between going into a test ready to crush it versus sulking into the test praying for a miracle.

I mean it. Leaving everything else off the table… confidence can skyrocket your successes. A lack of confidence can drag you down like quicksand as you eek your lips out for just one more breath before your sweet relief of…

Don’t believe me?

The Unbelievable Importance Of Confidence

Studies have been emphasizing the importance of self-confidence for decades now.

In its most basic advantage, self-confidence produces more effective actions out of a person.

“If you think a thing is impossible, you’ll only make it impossible.”

― Bruce Lee

If you think something is impossible then you’re less likely to try doing it at all. You’re less likely to prepare to do it beforehand. You’re less likely to notice if it does happen.

The same goes if you think something is almost impossible. It’s just going to reduce your ability to do the stuff you’d need to do to make it happen.

But…

If you go into something assuming that you’re capable of it…

You’re more likely to prepare to do it. You’re more likely to try and do it. And you’ll be paying attention to the results because you’re expecting it to work out.

But confidence does more than that –

Confidence also affects the people around you.

If you go into a social situation with confidence then you’ll help the other people believe that you’re someone they should want to be with. They will feel for confident themselves. They will enjoy your company more.

If you go into a social situation nervously then you’ll make them nervous. You’ll make them doubt you. They will enjoy your company less.

And academically, if you go into the classroom doubting yourself – your teacher will doubt you too. And that matters. Studies have shown that teachers tend to give student’s they believe to be low-scoring students lower grades (even when the student isn’t a low-scoring student.) Their lack of belief in the student is self-fulfilling.

“I Can’t Do Anything About It Anyway, Right?”

A lack of confidence sucks.

In university, that lack of confidence is even worse. You’re surrounded by bombastic personalities that are all looking, acting, and feeling the most confident they’ve ever felt in their life. (Trust me… 5 years into their career most of them are going to be overweight, low-energy, and just trying to make it through the day. Easy come, easy go.)

It starts making you doubt absolutely every stupid thing you need to address.

People that have “low confidence” tend to have low confidence that they can even change their confidence levels.

They think that they’re just “low confidence” people. They’re not naturally gifted with confidence… so they think that’s kind of what they’re stuck with.

But the problem is…

That’s just accepting the death sentence of mediocre results forever…

But it’s just not true.

I’ve watched tons of students make the change. And I’ve experienced the change myself.

Confidence is, largely, a choice.

And making that’s a decision you’re going to have to make habitually. Once that habit is changed, you’ll be a high confidence person (and you won’t even have to think about it.)

How To Be Confident (Even When You Don’t Have Much To Be Confident About)

Are you confident tying your shoes?

Yea?

Good.

Why are you confident tying your shoes?

Probably because you’ve done it a few million times.

That is the natural and ideal form of confidence. That’s confidence that’s developed from experience. You have the skill so you’re confident.

People that are top-notch at anything develop that kind of confidence. It’s confidence from competence.

But…

You can be confident in things you’re not very good at too.

Haven’t you ever seen someone that sucks at something acting proud like they’re super good at it?

In fact, imagine a small child holding up their latest “work of art.” The child would show the world’s greatest artists their scribbled painting with a confidence that could blow the mind of your average college student.

Confidence doesn’t only come from competence in a very specific field. It also comes from competence at broader things.

Just because you’ve never done something, it doesn’t mean you don’t have the skills required to do well at it.

I once watched a top-notch guitar player pick up a bass guitar for the first time in his life. Within 5 minutes, he could convince anyone he was a bassist.

Skills do transfer.

And take note: social skills are one of the most powerful skills to transfer from place to place. If you’re confident in social situations then you can do well in interviews, social gatherings, classrooms, and just about anywhere else you run into people.

But…

What about when you’re skills don’t transfer into what you’re doing, and you don’t think you’re going to be good at something?

Here is the dirty little secret of confidence that those “super confident” people can never tell you:

Confident people ACT confident.

Most of confidence doesn’t come from this natural feeling of confidence.

It comes from people habitually going through the motions of a confident person. They stand up straight. They smile. They look people in the eyes. They talk loud. They dress like they’ve got someplace important to go.

They go through the motions of confidence.

And they go through those motions habitually.

This Is How You Become A Truly Confident Person

Whenever you catch yourself acting uncertain, correct yourself.

Act confident.

Play pretend if you must. The people around you will feel better for it. You’ll help them feel more comfortable around you while you’re making yourself feel better.

This act will change the way your physiology responds to every single situation. Simple things like putting a smile on your face can release hormones that will make you happier. Standing up straight will give your brain signals that you’re feeling confident. Talking loud and proud will make what you’re saying important (to yourself and to others.)

And over time, this becomes habitual.

Whenever you enter a college classroom, make it a habit to stand up straight. Don’t slink over to your seat in the back of the classroom. Look around. Smile at anyone looking at you. Maybe even go say hi to someone you’ve never talked to before (but don’t worry… this can be pushing it when you’re just starting out.)

Confidence in college can make everything a whole lot easier.

Don’t settle for a lack of it.

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